I have always had an entrepreneurial spirit. Over the years, I have had many ideas that I could and would make good business concepts. For a variety of reasons, I have only acted on a few of them. Today's concept is different though. This has low barriers to entry and is foolproof. In fact, it actually depends on fools.
With non-appreciating home values, tremendous selection and once in a life-time interest rates, home buyers have hit gambling's equivalent of the Trifecta. Throw in the $7,500 tax credit and first-time homebuyers are sitting on the best opportunity of their lives to create wealth in their families. Unfortunately for them, buyers either don't know what they are missing or are foolishly afraid of success.
Within a relatively short-period of time, these conditions will change. Rate increases will be the most likely culprit. Stealing 11% of buying power with every 1 point increase. Buyers will watch helplessly as they realize that 'the deal' they was in their grasp, but has now passed.
This is where my plan comes into play. Once buyers and sellers realize the error of their ways, they will want to kick themselves in the rear for not acting. As this is virtually impossible to accomplish with any measure of satisfaction, the ex-potential buyer will be further depressed by an inability to accomplish this simple task. For a nominal fee, I will rectify this situation.
Here's my Press Release...
Grand Opening Celebration of Louisville Ass-Kickers

Where : Shepherdsville - Near the stockyards
When: April 1, 2009
Who: All Louisville, Shepherdsville and Mt Washington persons who have not taken advantage of the current real estate market. Specifically, if you can answer "yes" to any of the following questions, this service is for you!
-
Did you miss out on the purchase of a great home because you were waiting on rates to drop and someone else bought it?
-
Did you miss the lowest rates in history because you were not pre-approved?
-
Are you going to wait until June to start looking and miss the $7500 Tax Credit?
-
Are you missing buyers because your house is not on the market?
-
Are you missing a sale and costing yourself money because your home is overpriced or under-prepared?
-
Did your listing expire because you didn't choose an agent who could market your Louisville Home Online?
What: For the low price of $100 / kick, deluded souls can line up for a proper kicking by a real ass. Our donkeys have been specially bred and maintained to deliver a blow that is sure to prevent you from sitting idle the next time opportunity knocks at your door. (For that matter, it will be some time before you sit at all).
SPECIAL: The first 100 customers have the right to pay twice the normal rate. You've been throwing money away anyway, why stop now?
Call NOW to reserve your spot in line.
* * * * *
For those of you who want to avoid the long lines, check out these articles on how to accomplish your real estate goals.
Attention Buyers: Create Your Own Success Story
How to Market Your Louisville Area Home Online
* * * * *
Erik Hitzelberger is a licensed real estate agent with RE/MAX Alliance in Louisville. If you need a Louisville Real Estate agent please email me or call 502.921.3989.
I specialize in the following areas of the Metro Louisville Area: Jeffersontown (J-Town), Okolona, Fern Creek, Shepherdsville, Mt Washington, Hillview, Brooks and Pewee Valley. Click the following links to learn more about Louisville and Bullitt County Real Estate or to Search for Louisville Homes.

Erik - I have to admit - this could be the coolest sports team name that I have ever heard.
Lol Jason, I'm almost surprised that it wasn't one of the original XFL franchises.
not to mention that tax credit could be 15,000 by the end of the week. Its already through either the house or the senate I can't remember which.
Oh I like this one, I like it a lot.
Brilliance, pure brilliance..... I want to avoid the long lines, hopefully others will also. KM
David - While I think that would be great, I still feel like there will be a number of people who still are afraid to take control of their lives and buy something. I just don't get it.
JL - I thought you might. If you are interested in franchising, just let me know.
Kristin - Thanks! I put my house for sale last week. We had no intention of moving for a couple of years, but I am not going to be in that line either.
Very very good Erik! I wish I could figure out how to get this point across to a few dopes!
April - I hate to see it. People went crazy buying everything under the sun when prices were high. Who cares if it has wallpaper from the 70s, carpet from the 80s, termites from the 90s and is priced for 2020? I have to have it. Now, pristine homes priced at or below market value just sit. What part of "Buyer's Market" is so hard to grasp?
Erik - This is a great idea. I'll come out for the grand opening and will even donate to the cause. Its even possible that i have a few people to send your way as customers.
John - I look forward to seeing you here! Have faith that your non-clients will be well taken care of if you send them my way.
LMAO! I love the sly sense of humor in this, Erik...think that the fence sitters will get it?
Lisa - The direct approach doesn't seem to be working. This is my last attempt before breaking out the gasoline and setting fire to the fence.
In the spirit of full disclosure, make sure the local fire dept is on standby before you light that match!
I'll make sure that there is no doubt who I represent.
Nice piece... I like it!
-Tre
Thanks Tre. Send your fence-sitters on over and we'll take care of them.
Erik,
sounds like you have been in the business long enough to know IT'S TIME TO BUY.
Johnathan